Da Bachelorhood

Now, don’t judge a book by its cover. I’m a chilvaristic guy, although machiavellian at times (what the fuck does guy mean?), and I would never touch a women in anger. Unless it was one of these women. Let’s admit it, the rules that we’ve grown up with can only take us so far. We all know how to be nice to women and treat a lady right. However, there are seven women that i know of on this planet that, if I ran into them in public, I would knock the fuck out. (more…)

Sometimes I’m not really being entertained, and my mind has time to wander infinitely, in search of excitement, like a gay dude in a stripclub. These times occur when i’m doing things like driving home from school or banging the same dead hooker for the third time (that’s right, i’m client numbers 9 though 11). So, my mind wanders to the existential. Does jersey’s girlfriend know the real reason he loves amusement parks so much is because he likes to fistfuck midgets on the wooden rollercoaster in rythmic time with the ‘clack clack?’ Does gazzerro know that he drinks so much mountain dew that his sperm are radioactive and super hyper, and that he could turn those 5 daily whacks into a goldmine with imitation horse cum? Does snakeyes really really not know what the pagebreak button is? Why doesn’t brick just run for governor of new york already? (more…)

Our condolences to his family, especially his young child. Heath Ledger was 29.

(cue up scene from 10 Thing I Hate About You when he’s singing… acting gold)

Its tough making the adjustment from college meat head alcoholic rugby playing Irishmen, to Monday through Friday 9-5, commuter working stiff. Especially when you take into account that before you started your job you went through your summer you had to endure graduation party season, which is a open bar paradise of liquor, beer, and sundresses.
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